Oh no, looking at Rocky’s bio it seems that she still has a lot of issues resulting from this time in her life… And it’s very sad that her younger sisters can’t at least understand her mistrust, even if the do not share it.
Shez should just kill Chris when he comes out of prison <3 I'm sure nobody owuld miss him.
I've gone back and reread the entire chapter and I had forgotten what it was called — "The Daughter of Meriam". It's such a beatiful title for this story, because no matter how determined Shez was as a kid, she could have never managed to save herself (and her sisters, and her mom) if Meriam hadn't been tough as nails. It's saddening that the entire family didn't get a perfect happy ending where they all agree on how to feel about this topic, but I suppose it would have been unrealistic. I am glad, then, that at least Meriam and Shez came out of this with their bond stronger than ever.
Indeed, at such a tender age, and being a direct target of Chris’ violence, she was a lot more deeply affected than either of her younger sisters 🙁
Re: title, yesssss you get it! You get it!! I am so proud of this chapter’s title, it feels so perfect for Shez and Meriam’s story. I also completely agree with your assessment on their relationship. I think the same could be said in the other direction too. Had Shez not put herself between Meriam and Chris, Meriam might have suffered in silence, believing she deserved it somehow. Seeing her daughter on the receiving end of abuse was a huge wake up call. Without their love and loyalty to each other, they never would have made it. I believe that’s why they’ve managed to stay so strong and unified since. They share a unique understanding that the younger daughters don’t.
Also laughed out loud at your suggestion. Absolutely love the callous attitudes towards Chris! :3c
Oh, forgot to add: The moment Jaden is thinking back on here, is that something we’ve seen before? I don’t remember it, but it’s been a while since I reread the older chapters 👀
While this is obviously not a happy memory for her to think back on I think it’s nice to remember that Alexis plans to open a practice where she only employs women, which I’m sure Shez would think is super cool
Boy I really hope Chris starts acting crazy in prison so that one of his cellmates gives him a warning jab on his kidneys. Hope he was stealing/using from his own supply so that his homies sort him out while inside. Hope he dies a natural death from “suicide” in his cell, etc, etc.
But anyways, let’s talk about the girls cause I love predictions and book cover judgements. First, Rocky marciano…so selective mutism is it? 🙁 Well that’s what I got from that…Guess she’s kind of a ‘strong but quiet’ type. I do like that she has such a strong connection to her older sister still, though it’s very sad she has pretty much lost trust on people, mostly because I know it’s going to make her life harder on the long run…But well, at least she didn’t have to live through more of that.
Now, the baby sisters. Karissa…mm, she looks like that feminine straight girl that is really nice, really fun, bubbly and whatnot. I’d definitely say she’s a popular one. But she’s also one to do some out of pocket shit from time to time, and it makes it hard to be mad at her because she’s usually well…nice. It’s kind of those frustrating situations where you know she’s like that because…she doesn’t know about that real shit. She may ‘know’ but she don’t KNOW so you can’t blame her all that much, which can get irritating pretty quick.
Christine, very cute, probably kinda quiet timid type of girl. I’m guessing she’s a people pleaser; really wants to fit in like any 17 yo. I think Karissa may really enjoy some aspects of femininity but I’d be willing to bet that Christine’s is mostly a performance to have an easier time being liked. I also have the feeling she’s a little smarter than her older sister and she catches on quicker to the dynamics of her older sisters and mother, but she keeps it to herself.
This is such a juicy comment and I have to resist responding to so much of it
But yes, selective mutism is what I was going for with Rocky. She likely learned Auslan as a teen to help more with communicating. Calling to Meriam and Shez after they battered Chris was the last time she spoke. 🙁
“hell, even rissa’s got a boyfriend”
me, not even knowing anything about him: you should leave him.
her design is so cute though 😭 maybe the energy of sort of having your “attracted to jaden” hairstyle will make her realize she’s too good for him and/or bi, haha 😌
Correct response to a woman having a boyfriend LMFAO – especially in the LB universe.
I don’t think being bisexual would change anything. #Notallmen-ing is definitely a more prevalent problem in opposite-sex attracted women, but it’d a mindset not a sexuality.
Lesbians don’t have boyfriends, but they can still prioritize sons, brothers, fathers, male friends/colleagues over men.
very true! think i was giving rissa the benefit of the doubt and hoped her prioritizing males would end if she just dumped his ass for a woman. but yeah, that mindset runs deep, even in same sex attracted women. in this case, especially when chris was “nice” to her as a kid, it’d give her reason to not renounce him/men as a whole.. tragic
10
rustyhearts
Exactly!
I also wouldn’t want her to inflict that mindset on other women either 💀💀 there is an unfortunate trend of bisexual women not taking their attraction to women/relationships with women as seriously as the their ones with men.
That, and lesbians/bi women believing getting a gf is the answer to all their problems. They want ANY gf over not being alone.
I think Rissa would greatly benefit from female companionship more than any type of romantic relationship.
They were born at home without any contact with a hospital. So no birth certificate records. To enrol them in school they would need some sort of identification records, which is when she would have had to get the application process started.
Even without that it’s just a matter of paying a fee and filing an application.
I know this is an odd thing to say, but I like that Rocky is still marked as straight, not asexual, despite no interest in dating and being terrified of men. One of the things that drives me so nuts about typical tumblr gendie types is their tendency to conflate traumatized behavior with innate sexuality. Not that you NEED to be traumatized not to date men but that is clearly the case here.
Totally hear you there! It’s like the inverse of pathologizing normal behaviour as XYZ condition.
I genuinely don’t believe in asexuality (as in a lack of attraction to either sex, not a lack of interest in sexual activity), so it’s particularly disheartening to see trauma behaviours be attributed to some ~identity~.
Not a gendie-specific problem but they’re certainly regular fuel contributors to the fire.
Another example outside of asexuality nonsense is one I actually see among lesbians. Where they have “stonebutch”/”touch me not” or whatever. As I understand it, it means you don’t want to be touched by women in bed, you want to do all the giving sexually.
That really fucked me up when I was a teenager looking for lesbian community. Instead of recognizing that inexperience, internalized homophobia and other baggage was contributing to me not wanting to be touched by women (but very much wanting to touch them), I just adopted the label thinking it was a naturally occurring phenomenon that didn’t need addressing.
Asexuality is a bandaid label. A plug in your ears from addressing any of the circumstances that lead you to describe yourself that way (the saturation of pornography and the violent, degrading, male-pleasure-first standards it sets for sex, rise of hook-up culture, any sexual trauma experienced, religious guilt, internalized homophobia, ect ect) .
Not wanting to partake in sex is obviously fine, you can say no for any reason (preaching to the choir but yaknow), but it’s certainly worth understanding why that’s the case instead of slapping an identity label on it.
I tried to demonstrate this thinking pattern with Blaire as well, desperately trying to find a gender box that fits Riley’s symptoms (not wanting to wear a dress and becoming distressed when forced to) of trauma, rather than considering idk, a therapist to unpack Riley’s reactions. Not with the goal of getting her to be okay wearing a dress, but to work through what traumatised her.
Anyway, lmao. Yes. Agree. Not wanting to act on an attraction is not the same as not having one. You get it. I am 🫂🫂
oof that flashback. Brilliant choice but still awww… It sucks as a reader to know Chris will be shot by Horseblaire hours after he steps out of jail and still not being able to tell Shamz and Jade 😢. Only needing one bullet, but She will do one on the crotch (for Meriam) and one on the eye (for Shez)… absolute sniper queen
About Rocky. Ohhhhh ma’am ILY. I actually gasped at her job, now i understand your previous reply. Several thumbs up on the choice, even if it isnt what i imagined i’m rly happy (then she can later offer the ostrich classes for the advanced adrenaline lovers, see?!? it fits perfectly, great minds cosmically aligned). It sucks that the situation affected her that way, tho i’m sure she’ll gain an army of defenders in the fanbase as it grows.
I do think its interesting how she contrasts with Kai from the QT club who also has certain particularities. Now i am wondering about Kai’s family dynamics… Conspiracy Bonnet time once again.
Inquiry! Does Rocky know sign language?? even if not fully proficient at it that could be an interesting workaround that fits the situation in more than one way. Plus I gotta say the idea of her giving the middle finger or some other ‘in the know’ profane gesture to her sisters if they start talking rose colored glasses about their Dad or encouraging her to Fem Up or Find The Right Man(TM) is hilarious.
Maybe even with Shez also being another who knows it and she notices and gestures something like “hey! dont do that, respect” trying to hold back the laughter to do the right thing. Then Rocky be like “😤” but she loves her big sis and is secretly glad she gave her an undercover minicallout instead of loudly chastizing her letting the sisters know what she did. She knows Shez ‘Gets It’ and will always have her back if push comes to shove. Damn I’m invested
Re: Kai VS Rocky. Kai has no issue speaking to men and women with gender identities. She’s specifically choosing not to speak to un-gendered women because she sees them as the true oppressors of gender-identity-havers. Very different to Rocky’s situation 😅
Rocky definitely knows Auslan at this point to help with communication- so Shez and the others would know a bit too, atleast enough to understand even if they’re not as confident at signing it.
You’re right no doubt they are different, its why it stood out as contrast to me. Rocky’s issue is mainly men, Kai’s issue is mainly women, Rocky’s more subconscious Kai’s more conscious, Kai’s partnered and sexually active Rocky isnt, Rocky is tan and lighthaired Kai is pale and darkhaired, Kai adopted a gender, Rocky did not, Rocky looks good cosplaying as Naruto and Kai as Sasuke.
Though Kai’s case is more voluntary and conscious I was thinking along the backstory lines, like of Kai’s mom (or mom+other family member) being bad for XYZ reason and creating lots of accumulative resentment on Kai, which then later helps as a motivator (combined with others such as M/M Slash addiction and anxiety over fujoshi callouts) on Kai to separate further from “cis b*****s” and denounce them while feeling good via gender identity theory and activism 🤔 It sounded appealing cause you like showing different trajectories of Mother-daughter dynamics.
And i guess also cause it gives a sense of reasoning to the character, like Kai isn’t Like That just because out of the blue. IDK i kinda have a hard time seeing that character as mindlessly irritating, I guess my gut still want to believe there is some twist you’re saving there too 😅 not to justify and glitterwash Kai per se, but to make readers go “ahhh i see”
2
rustyhearts
Breastie.. Your ability to take me tf out completely unawares is truly a gift. I was NOT PREPARED for where that first paragraph ended LMAO!!
Kai is a victim of misogyny as all women are. However instead of taking a path to improve conditions for all women, she’s taking one to “escape” it so to speak. She’s swallowed the “I’m not a woman, I’m a person” nonsense wholeheartedly.
That’s coupled with her likely wanting to be like the fictional guys she reads about, who are afforded much more depth than their female counterparts, are all tall and skinny with nice hair and free from the typical constraints of misogyny.
To her, the treatment of women is not a problem. The problem is she doesn’t believe SHE should be treated like one.
She has surrounded herself with other women who also think this way, and pretend to be anything but women. It didn’t come out of the blue, it just didn’t come from home. It is its own response to the trauma of experiencing misogyny as a woman.
Poor Rocky. 🙁
Also, I’m still rooting for Chris to escape prison, get eaten by dingos and crocodiles, with like a foot left behind for identification, and then it’s reported in the news, and that’s how Shez and family find out he’s dead and can never terrorize them ever again. 🙂
I don’t want to Chris get eaten by dingos and crocodiles, they don’t deserve to eat trash. But I would root for any moid giving him a piece of his mind inside the prison, since child abusers are usually kept away from others because, if is known why he’s in prison, his life would end in being killed like he deserves. We can only wait for the male syndrome doing a good job in kicking Chris’s ass to Moid’s Hell.
Nah, see, I’m good with it because it’s just meat to dingos and crocs. People get eaten by animals all the time. Not something I’d wish on a decent person, but a Chris? Hell yeah.
Kay so I love this page because it smacked me and my like… expectations, I guess. Awhile back you commented to a reader that there was a draft where Shez BURNED THE HOUSE DOWN and that had me like “oh 🙁 that’s really cool, I wish the story went that way”, it was my like, ONE (1) SINGLE disappointment with LeaseBound so far. Well that along with Chris not being straight up murdered dead after that beat-down Meriam and Shez gave him. SURE, it leaves a lot of unanswered questions, sure it has that “oh hoho what if the police figure out Miriam and Shez killed him!” (which I don’t care so much about that concern – Chris was involved with illegal stuff and cops are so often lazy “ah dead criminal, he died because of his crimes, murdered by a criminal rival or whatever, job well done everyone.”) but like, I just was like “but it would be cool, though!” how often do women get to do WILD things and the plot just allows it. Men get away with so much in stories, and no one goes “but wait that’s not realistic” IF EDWARD ELRIC GETS TO BURN HIS HOUSE DOWN AND EVERYONE GOES “okay thats cool so raw of him :)” THEN WHY CANT SHEZ. i like fma but i always thought that was dumb. thats your moms house you ingrate boy she worked hard to make it nice and you burned it to be an edgy boy. haha i’m harsher on men to counteract how extra forgiving everyone else is to them. women get called selfish men get called cool
BUT my POINT is now I’m not disappointed with those story choices any more. Because LOOK at this conversation. okay okay. I gotta Trust Rusty’s Process. Rusty cut things because they had to be cut, because she saw a better story potential. This is a cool moment. As much as I love a murdered Chris and as much as I love the idea of the house being burned, I am thinking this right here is gonna be worth it.
Hoping in the next page Shez says “AND IF HE FINDS US I WILL KILL HIM” HAHAHAHA COME ON SHEZ COME ON SHEZ COME ON SHEZ COME ON SHEZ COME ON-
Anyway I love reading all of this, I love seeing the issue of separatism being brought up, I love seeing a story where no one is like “lol crazy women need to learn that some men are okay”, like it just feels disrespectful to Not All Men a woman who has been through that. I think sometimes trauma doesn’t make people illogical or irrational or mentally ill. Trauma actually sometimes makes people see The Truth. The Actual Real Truth. A lot of the time in society we live disconnected from the reality of things, but when a horrible incident happens to someone it can make you go “oh. shit, that’s something that can really happen. and this is actually very common. This is more common then society wants us to believe” Of course there is damage that comes along with severe trauma that needs to be healed, but I’m sick of trauma victims being taught that the things they learn from their trauma are unrealistic. This story understands Shez, Meriam and Rocky have a deeper understanding of what men are capable of. They are authorities, two of them are respected teachers who women come to learn from. It’s great, very powerful. Rocky isn’t seen as irrational for her avoidance of men, instead we’re going WHAT THE HECK? At Rissa, who is choosing to live in the denial that society sells us about how deadly men can be, despite her beloved family having personal experience.
You tell an important story and share an important perspective. It’s too bad a lot of women will be put off by the trans stuff, and will assume everything you have to say has no value because of the trans stuff. I certainly hope some of the people who engage with your work while being angry about your stance on trans issues can give some thought to some of the other topics you bring up. This kind of survivor-first perspective that treats survivors as the experts on their own experience is very rare in most stories. The Shez story really can stand alone on it’s own and I think it holds a lot of value.
ps love jaden thinking about how male-oriented belief systems is so damaging even without a man being violently abusive. Men ruin families while still being “loving fathers”. Maria sure didnt pop out of her mother’s womb certain that women have no value unless they are housewives and mothers. She didn’t decide to ruin her daughter’s life all on her own. She had to be taught that women have no agency and must be subservient to men.
WELCOME BACK, BELOVED 🥰🥰
I promise your trust will not be wasted 🙏🙏 I love that you felt the same about FMA and the house burning too tho, damn! Felt so disrespectful sheesh!
I love what you said about victims understanding a truth, rather than being made delusional by their trauma – which I think is a common narrative particularly when it comes to women who’ve suffered from male violence. Hell, in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy when treating PTSD, “all men are dangerous/ no man can be trusted” is an example of irrational thinking or a “stuck point” that needs to be “corrected”. Makes me fucken livid.
You’re so on the money about Shez and Meriam being treated as experts due to their experiences too. That’s exactly what I wanted to come across so your analysis is very vindicating ❤️
Thank you so much for another long, thoughtful comment. It’s always a delight when you pop on. I hope I get the pleasure of hearing your thoughts on the last few pages 🥰🥰
ding-dong edward elric burning his family’s happy little house just to be an edgy boy vs Shez burning down the house that was an ACTUAL PRISON to her WHOLE FAMILY it’s just SUCH A HUGE CONTRAST. Even though it’s already clear to me I’m going to vastly prefer the version of the story you settled as being the best I am ALWAYS going to fondly think of that fire. I’m glad you told a commenter about it. Your creator’s commentary is the best. The alternative version brings me so much joy. Just that image of Shez standing outside a burning house smiling while her little sisters happily roast marshmallows on the flames (i know they wouldn’t actually happily roast marshmallows shh this is my dream)
yyeeeeuuccckk I didn’t know that about CBT 🙁 That’s a real shame that distrust of men just CAN’T be treated like the natural, normal and logical choice that it is. Can’t be having that in a patriarchy, no no no! I mean like we really do have statistics on our side. we all know what the biggest danger to women in human society really is….. What a waste of time it is to try to gaslight a person rather then try to help them solve their real problems. I like to think that no one in this family was subjected to that kind of thing in their healing journey, and if they were, I hope Meriam was like “NOPE, WE’RE GETTING HELP SOMEWHERE ELSE”. though I do think it would make sense if it did happen, and maybe some of the younger sisters agreed that Forgiving Men Is True Healing :/ there isn’t always a lot of options about where to get help, especially when a person is low income with few resources.
I have to admit I am getting lazier about commenting regularly compared to how I used to be. It’s really like cool how much your comment section has grown, I feel like I don’t need to say as much as I used to because there are so many other thoughtful women here, many of them catching things I didn’t even think of. Sometimes I just don’t feel like I have anything to add because other women have already said so much smart stuff already. but you know with comments the more the merrier. Even a simple “ME LIKE COMIC GOOD JOB RUSTY THANK YOU FOR MAKING ARTS STORY GOOD” is better then nothing 🤣 gotta do my part to fight how weirdly low engagement the internet has become for creatives these days (i swear artists used to get more comments back in the Old Days of the Old Internet)
4
rustyhearts
If anyone ever feels like writing the alternative outcome, I’d be so here for it. Definitely consider Shez burning the house with Chris inside as an AU lmao!
So glad you enjoyed the creator’s commentary though 🥰🥰
And yeah, the CBT stuff is depressing 🙁
I will be touching a little on it in the Epilogue Pages that will directly follow after Chapter 12’s conclusion. There’s 8 parts (some multi-pagers) to look forward to 🥰
Also, please don’t feel bad about not replying as much, I’d hate to make you feel forced to! I appreciate anything and anytimr you have something to say 🥰
I still remember where I was when your first long comment came in, and excitedly reading it to my wife right after I read it. Knowing someone across the globe was so touched by my story really motivated me. I came back and read it SO many times.
And now, yeah! The comment section has grown so much. I love seeing so many regular commenters and getting to know their unique “voices”, and also being pleasantly surprised when newcomers arrive too 🥰
Gush gush, feel good ramble. Thank you for commenting 🥰🥰
I love how Karissa and Christine are just plain straight, even if this comic is about lesbian/bi women. In any other “QT+ comic” they would be straight but with “extra steps” because “being straight in this era is illegal”, according to TRAs, although they would be treated as such by the TIFs clowns, specially Tiff/Kai.
I bet people will complain about Meriam not approving to ‘Rissa’s bf being at her home, but this is not for “heterophobia”, but the fact that she expects that ‘Rissa is not dating another Chris-esque moid. But if he’s a good man, we wouldn’t know because men’s syndrome would make him stay out of the comic to focus only in the women. This is also for Rocky too, but I can see why she’s not interested in dating at all (I’m straight but my ship sailed time ago to seek for a couple, I want to live on my own being happy myself first).
And I have to say I looooooooooooove the coloring in this page. You’re really getting better to pick the right colors about the “vibe”: Happy women in the page? Everything is colorful. Women in distress? 2 colors palette or a dark scene to make sure this is quite serious. It makes me happy how much you’re progressing as an artist and it makes me happy to see it myself.
Love the pro-separatism here. Can confirm as someone who has never had (and never will have) a boyfriend that it’s one of the best ways to avoid violent situations. I know people will say that’s extreme, but isn’t there a statistic that most women are murdered by a male close to them? Also, I’ve never come across a man that was worth being in a relationship with anyway.
I know the statistic you’re talking about, men that women are close to are one of the biggest dangers, yeah.
I think there’s an interesting parallell between criticisms of self-defence and separatism, especially when it comes to insinuating that encouraging either is “victim blaming”.
“So the women who don’t participate deserve the harm that comes to them?”.
No, of course not. Men are responsible for the harm they do to women. Though, the part unacknowledged is that they CHOOSE to harm women. They cannot be convinced of women’s humanity. So premeptive/protective measures like self defence or separatism are left in the hands of women.
I thought it made a nice link to tie the two together in Shez’s philosophy for self defence.
Also happy to hear you’re prioritising your safety and happiness ❤️❤️
Thank you ♡ I definitely agree with you on taking protective measures. I also think it’s like “prevention over cure” with diseases. Yes, people already sick absolutely deserve a cure, but prevention (such as vaccines) makes it so that you’re far less likely to get sick in the first place.
Also, forgot to say this in my original comment, but I like that Rocky is a GNC, celibate straight woman. They’re few and far between, but still definitely exist. One is a very dear friend to me, so it’s neat seeing someone like her in this comic 🙂
Proud of you for being able to make this choice. A lot of women talk like being single is terrible and unbearable. Also, there’s a lot of social conditioning encouraging us all to be desperate to have a boyfriend. But you are so right when you say men aren’t worth having relationships with anyway. If they aren’t nice people who will improve our lives, we shouldn’t compromise and date them anyway. Women tend to be way more caring, compassionate and better listeners. Having a good female friend is fulfilling in ways having a callous boyfriend would never be.
I meant to vote for Risa 😭 but just wanna say I discovered ur comic today because I say a call out vid for you on yt abt ur beliefs but I love ur comic I read it all in one night and i think a lot of our beliefs are the same but difference is ur more brave abt urs than i am abt mine I love the comic tho and hope you make more pages soon I would’ve kept reading even if it was a million pages lol
Hey so, I hope that when it’s not from a place of deeply bad faith or malicious intent you’re still ok with comments from someone who, while not exactly in a popular way(?), does fall into a category that essentially is, for all intents and purposes, trans.
I want to say that, while I don’t 100% agree with every last Outside-The-Comic perspective, it is still very liberating to see dynamics and forms of faced misogyny that within the more popular sects of “the community” go completely unaddressed for the sake of what seems to be temporary comfort, or not stirring the pot.
I have, for example, faced actual and blatant misogyny from trans women while being told I’m not allowed to call it such because I’m “aligned” with masculinity and they are not, without any invalidating I would seek comradere from other trans people, and had under a niave good faith assumed trans men, trans women etc if truly wanting to unpack things like misogyny would want to hold people accountable for actively perpetuating it under a different name, and as I suppose you can guess, that was largely and overwhelmingly (online at least) not the case.
I’ve been told I couldn’t talk about a trans woman who tried to coerce PIV, I’ve been told by other trans men that I’m broken if I don’t want PIV, I’ve seen broken and shattered people still bending over backwards to not acknowledge that what we’re taught to think about people in relation to their bodies when we grow up can still impact how we treat people even if (as the terms tend to go) gender identity, presentation etc is changed.
It’s to where, with those few exceptions, I cannot even speak on the misogyny I’ve faced from some cis men without being policed by other trans people, predominantly trans fems who still live their lives as cis men, ans trans men who exclusively live for the validation of anyone with a penis.
So, know that even among “us”, many can see themselves and there struggles here, even when we might not see eye to eye on things like semantics, or the roots of some concepts.
Hey,
Thanks for leaving your comment. You’re more than welcome here, and also right on the money re: commenting good faith, being the general criteria 👍
While I am completely unsurprised about your experiences, I am sorry that you’ve had them. You’re right to notice something is amiss, and it’s not exclusive to trans communities, nor did it start there. I’ll admit that all day, everyday. No mixed-sex group wants to acknowledge misogyny.
I guarantee that regardless of your gender-identity or lack thereof, misogynists (anyone who doesn’t want to acknowledge it) would find another way, or excuse or rule to silence you. Recognizing patterns of mistreatment and why they happen is the last thing an oppressor wants. It’s much easier to control/exploit/harm those who don’t recognise their oppression, and its certainly better on an oppresso’s own ego/ conscience.
The most powerful thing you can do is continue to speak the truth as you see it. (That’s why I make the art that I do now).
Those who want to stop you from speaking aren’t worth being around- regardless any other identity markers they have.
I’m sorry that you were made to feel broken for not wanting PIV, and shut down when naming predators who use their identities as a shield. I’m sorry our experience with misogyny, and being silenced for trying to talk about it are what make us similar, underneath all our differences in beliefs. I wish the reality of being born female was different.
Thank you again for writing and sharing your experiences. I’m genuinely touched by your comment, as I am by many readers who also see themselves in the perspectives I portray. It reminds me that I’m doing something worthwhile, that the art I’m making now is important – even if not to everyone, and to keep speaking up about misogyny.
I have been made aware 😅
Isn’t the first of its kind, won’t be the last. That’s all part of putting yourself and your work out there. Feel free to investigate/engage for yourselves if you wish, but don’t do so on my behalf – I’m not interested in weighing in on it.
49 thoughts on “CH12P53”
rustyhearts
Rocky’s bio is now up!
Vote on who you’d like to see next week:
❤️for Tina
💔for Rissa
Anita
Oh no, looking at Rocky’s bio it seems that she still has a lot of issues resulting from this time in her life… And it’s very sad that her younger sisters can’t at least understand her mistrust, even if the do not share it.
Shez should just kill Chris when he comes out of prison <3 I'm sure nobody owuld miss him.
I've gone back and reread the entire chapter and I had forgotten what it was called — "The Daughter of Meriam". It's such a beatiful title for this story, because no matter how determined Shez was as a kid, she could have never managed to save herself (and her sisters, and her mom) if Meriam hadn't been tough as nails. It's saddening that the entire family didn't get a perfect happy ending where they all agree on how to feel about this topic, but I suppose it would have been unrealistic. I am glad, then, that at least Meriam and Shez came out of this with their bond stronger than ever.
rustyhearts
Indeed, at such a tender age, and being a direct target of Chris’ violence, she was a lot more deeply affected than either of her younger sisters 🙁
Re: title, yesssss you get it! You get it!! I am so proud of this chapter’s title, it feels so perfect for Shez and Meriam’s story. I also completely agree with your assessment on their relationship. I think the same could be said in the other direction too. Had Shez not put herself between Meriam and Chris, Meriam might have suffered in silence, believing she deserved it somehow. Seeing her daughter on the receiving end of abuse was a huge wake up call. Without their love and loyalty to each other, they never would have made it. I believe that’s why they’ve managed to stay so strong and unified since. They share a unique understanding that the younger daughters don’t.
Also laughed out loud at your suggestion. Absolutely love the callous attitudes towards Chris! :3c
Anita
Oh, forgot to add: The moment Jaden is thinking back on here, is that something we’ve seen before? I don’t remember it, but it’s been a while since I reread the older chapters 👀
rustyhearts
Indeed you have seen it before. 🙂
The scene starts here if you wanted to revisit
Anita
Oof, that was what it was…
While this is obviously not a happy memory for her to think back on I think it’s nice to remember that Alexis plans to open a practice where she only employs women, which I’m sure Shez would think is super cool
Ms. Clicker
Boy I really hope Chris starts acting crazy in prison so that one of his cellmates gives him a warning jab on his kidneys. Hope he was stealing/using from his own supply so that his homies sort him out while inside. Hope he dies a natural death from “suicide” in his cell, etc, etc.
But anyways, let’s talk about the girls cause I love predictions and book cover judgements. First, Rocky marciano…so selective mutism is it? 🙁 Well that’s what I got from that…Guess she’s kind of a ‘strong but quiet’ type. I do like that she has such a strong connection to her older sister still, though it’s very sad she has pretty much lost trust on people, mostly because I know it’s going to make her life harder on the long run…But well, at least she didn’t have to live through more of that.
Now, the baby sisters. Karissa…mm, she looks like that feminine straight girl that is really nice, really fun, bubbly and whatnot. I’d definitely say she’s a popular one. But she’s also one to do some out of pocket shit from time to time, and it makes it hard to be mad at her because she’s usually well…nice. It’s kind of those frustrating situations where you know she’s like that because…she doesn’t know about that real shit. She may ‘know’ but she don’t KNOW so you can’t blame her all that much, which can get irritating pretty quick.
Christine, very cute, probably kinda quiet timid type of girl. I’m guessing she’s a people pleaser; really wants to fit in like any 17 yo. I think Karissa may really enjoy some aspects of femininity but I’d be willing to bet that Christine’s is mostly a performance to have an easier time being liked. I also have the feeling she’s a little smarter than her older sister and she catches on quicker to the dynamics of her older sisters and mother, but she keeps it to herself.
rustyhearts
This is such a juicy comment and I have to resist responding to so much of it
But yes, selective mutism is what I was going for with Rocky. She likely learned Auslan as a teen to help more with communicating. Calling to Meriam and Shez after they battered Chris was the last time she spoke. 🙁
Ms. Clicker
Damn that bad, huh? :///
Though I gotta say, the feeling I may be right on at least some points it’s exhilarating…mmm, yes, keep revealing plot points to me mmm
rustyhearts
I am keeping my lips so sealed rn can neither confirm nor deny um um um..!
✂️🍆
Meriam holding firm on her no scrotes in the house rule and teaching women not to depend on men. She’s an absolute queen!
rustyhearts
Her crowns just keep coming 👸👸👸
Parniya’s biggest fan
Ugh I hate men. That’s it that’s the comment.
rustyhearts
So true breastie, thank you for saying so ❤️
lynnline
“hell, even rissa’s got a boyfriend”
me, not even knowing anything about him: you should leave him.
her design is so cute though 😭 maybe the energy of sort of having your “attracted to jaden” hairstyle will make her realize she’s too good for him and/or bi, haha 😌
rustyhearts
Correct response to a woman having a boyfriend LMFAO – especially in the LB universe.
I don’t think being bisexual would change anything. #Notallmen-ing is definitely a more prevalent problem in opposite-sex attracted women, but it’d a mindset not a sexuality.
Lesbians don’t have boyfriends, but they can still prioritize sons, brothers, fathers, male friends/colleagues over men.
lynnline
very true! think i was giving rissa the benefit of the doubt and hoped her prioritizing males would end if she just dumped his ass for a woman. but yeah, that mindset runs deep, even in same sex attracted women. in this case, especially when chris was “nice” to her as a kid, it’d give her reason to not renounce him/men as a whole.. tragic
rustyhearts
Exactly!
I also wouldn’t want her to inflict that mindset on other women either 💀💀 there is an unfortunate trend of bisexual women not taking their attraction to women/relationships with women as seriously as the their ones with men.
That, and lesbians/bi women believing getting a gf is the answer to all their problems. They want ANY gf over not being alone.
I think Rissa would greatly benefit from female companionship more than any type of romantic relationship.
Tyto
I have a question – How did Meriam maneged to give her daughters different surnames? Like, legally?
rustyhearts
They were born at home without any contact with a hospital. So no birth certificate records. To enrol them in school they would need some sort of identification records, which is when she would have had to get the application process started.
Even without that it’s just a matter of paying a fee and filing an application.
Norm L. Esbian
oh my god… rocky’s sisters not all men her huh
rustyhearts
U-U
TifHater
I know this is an odd thing to say, but I like that Rocky is still marked as straight, not asexual, despite no interest in dating and being terrified of men. One of the things that drives me so nuts about typical tumblr gendie types is their tendency to conflate traumatized behavior with innate sexuality. Not that you NEED to be traumatized not to date men but that is clearly the case here.
rustyhearts
Totally hear you there! It’s like the inverse of pathologizing normal behaviour as XYZ condition.
I genuinely don’t believe in asexuality (as in a lack of attraction to either sex, not a lack of interest in sexual activity), so it’s particularly disheartening to see trauma behaviours be attributed to some ~identity~.
Not a gendie-specific problem but they’re certainly regular fuel contributors to the fire.
Another example outside of asexuality nonsense is one I actually see among lesbians. Where they have “stonebutch”/”touch me not” or whatever. As I understand it, it means you don’t want to be touched by women in bed, you want to do all the giving sexually.
That really fucked me up when I was a teenager looking for lesbian community. Instead of recognizing that inexperience, internalized homophobia and other baggage was contributing to me not wanting to be touched by women (but very much wanting to touch them), I just adopted the label thinking it was a naturally occurring phenomenon that didn’t need addressing.
Asexuality is a bandaid label. A plug in your ears from addressing any of the circumstances that lead you to describe yourself that way (the saturation of pornography and the violent, degrading, male-pleasure-first standards it sets for sex, rise of hook-up culture, any sexual trauma experienced, religious guilt, internalized homophobia, ect ect) .
Not wanting to partake in sex is obviously fine, you can say no for any reason (preaching to the choir but yaknow), but it’s certainly worth understanding why that’s the case instead of slapping an identity label on it.
I tried to demonstrate this thinking pattern with Blaire as well, desperately trying to find a gender box that fits Riley’s symptoms (not wanting to wear a dress and becoming distressed when forced to) of trauma, rather than considering idk, a therapist to unpack Riley’s reactions. Not with the goal of getting her to be okay wearing a dress, but to work through what traumatised her.
Anyway, lmao. Yes. Agree. Not wanting to act on an attraction is not the same as not having one. You get it. I am 🫂🫂
Someone hug them both plz
oof that flashback. Brilliant choice but still awww… It sucks as a reader to know Chris will be shot by Horseblaire hours after he steps out of jail and still not being able to tell Shamz and Jade 😢. Only needing one bullet, but She will do one on the crotch (for Meriam) and one on the eye (for Shez)… absolute sniper queen
About Rocky. Ohhhhh ma’am ILY. I actually gasped at her job, now i understand your previous reply. Several thumbs up on the choice, even if it isnt what i imagined i’m rly happy (then she can later offer the ostrich classes for the advanced adrenaline lovers, see?!? it fits perfectly, great minds cosmically aligned). It sucks that the situation affected her that way, tho i’m sure she’ll gain an army of defenders in the fanbase as it grows.
I do think its interesting how she contrasts with Kai from the QT club who also has certain particularities. Now i am wondering about Kai’s family dynamics… Conspiracy Bonnet time once again.
Inquiry! Does Rocky know sign language?? even if not fully proficient at it that could be an interesting workaround that fits the situation in more than one way. Plus I gotta say the idea of her giving the middle finger or some other ‘in the know’ profane gesture to her sisters if they start talking rose colored glasses about their Dad or encouraging her to Fem Up or Find The Right Man(TM) is hilarious.
Maybe even with Shez also being another who knows it and she notices and gestures something like “hey! dont do that, respect” trying to hold back the laughter to do the right thing. Then Rocky be like “😤” but she loves her big sis and is secretly glad she gave her an undercover minicallout instead of loudly chastizing her letting the sisters know what she did. She knows Shez ‘Gets It’ and will always have her back if push comes to shove. Damn I’m invested
rustyhearts
Adore your everlasting faith in horseblaire 🤣🤣
Re: Kai VS Rocky. Kai has no issue speaking to men and women with gender identities. She’s specifically choosing not to speak to un-gendered women because she sees them as the true oppressors of gender-identity-havers. Very different to Rocky’s situation 😅
Rocky definitely knows Auslan at this point to help with communication- so Shez and the others would know a bit too, atleast enough to understand even if they’re not as confident at signing it.
Nominating HorseBlaire for patron saint hehe
You’re right no doubt they are different, its why it stood out as contrast to me. Rocky’s issue is mainly men, Kai’s issue is mainly women, Rocky’s more subconscious Kai’s more conscious, Kai’s partnered and sexually active Rocky isnt, Rocky is tan and lighthaired Kai is pale and darkhaired, Kai adopted a gender, Rocky did not, Rocky looks good cosplaying as Naruto and Kai as Sasuke.
Though Kai’s case is more voluntary and conscious I was thinking along the backstory lines, like of Kai’s mom (or mom+other family member) being bad for XYZ reason and creating lots of accumulative resentment on Kai, which then later helps as a motivator (combined with others such as M/M Slash addiction and anxiety over fujoshi callouts) on Kai to separate further from “cis b*****s” and denounce them while feeling good via gender identity theory and activism 🤔 It sounded appealing cause you like showing different trajectories of Mother-daughter dynamics.
And i guess also cause it gives a sense of reasoning to the character, like Kai isn’t Like That just because out of the blue. IDK i kinda have a hard time seeing that character as mindlessly irritating, I guess my gut still want to believe there is some twist you’re saving there too 😅 not to justify and glitterwash Kai per se, but to make readers go “ahhh i see”
rustyhearts
Breastie.. Your ability to take me tf out completely unawares is truly a gift. I was NOT PREPARED for where that first paragraph ended LMAO!!
I definitely do like to show different trajectories of Mother-Daughter dynamics. In the case of Kai though, she’s the one putting strain on their relationship. Her mother’s only “crime” is suggesting why she needs to be a boy, instead of just being a tomboy woman. Aka, not capitulating to her delusions of gender.
Kai is a victim of misogyny as all women are. However instead of taking a path to improve conditions for all women, she’s taking one to “escape” it so to speak. She’s swallowed the “I’m not a woman, I’m a person” nonsense wholeheartedly.
That’s coupled with her likely wanting to be like the fictional guys she reads about, who are afforded much more depth than their female counterparts, are all tall and skinny with nice hair and free from the typical constraints of misogyny.
To her, the treatment of women is not a problem. The problem is she doesn’t believe SHE should be treated like one.
She has surrounded herself with other women who also think this way, and pretend to be anything but women. It didn’t come out of the blue, it just didn’t come from home. It is its own response to the trauma of experiencing misogyny as a woman.
Crypty
Reading the new page: 🙂🙂🙂
Reading Rocky’s Bio: 😢😢😢
The fact that the last thing she said was Shez’s nickname: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
BlackSwallowtail
Poor Rocky. 🙁
Also, I’m still rooting for Chris to escape prison, get eaten by dingos and crocodiles, with like a foot left behind for identification, and then it’s reported in the news, and that’s how Shez and family find out he’s dead and can never terrorize them ever again. 🙂
Nonnie
I don’t want to Chris get eaten by dingos and crocodiles, they don’t deserve to eat trash. But I would root for any moid giving him a piece of his mind inside the prison, since child abusers are usually kept away from others because, if is known why he’s in prison, his life would end in being killed like he deserves. We can only wait for the male syndrome doing a good job in kicking Chris’s ass to Moid’s Hell.
BlackSwallowtail
Nah, see, I’m good with it because it’s just meat to dingos and crocs. People get eaten by animals all the time. Not something I’d wish on a decent person, but a Chris? Hell yeah.
Tenbelow
WWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUGGHH
Kay so I love this page because it smacked me and my like… expectations, I guess. Awhile back you commented to a reader that there was a draft where Shez BURNED THE HOUSE DOWN and that had me like “oh 🙁 that’s really cool, I wish the story went that way”, it was my like, ONE (1) SINGLE disappointment with LeaseBound so far. Well that along with Chris not being straight up murdered dead after that beat-down Meriam and Shez gave him. SURE, it leaves a lot of unanswered questions, sure it has that “oh hoho what if the police figure out Miriam and Shez killed him!” (which I don’t care so much about that concern – Chris was involved with illegal stuff and cops are so often lazy “ah dead criminal, he died because of his crimes, murdered by a criminal rival or whatever, job well done everyone.”) but like, I just was like “but it would be cool, though!” how often do women get to do WILD things and the plot just allows it. Men get away with so much in stories, and no one goes “but wait that’s not realistic” IF EDWARD ELRIC GETS TO BURN HIS HOUSE DOWN AND EVERYONE GOES “okay thats cool so raw of him :)” THEN WHY CANT SHEZ. i like fma but i always thought that was dumb. thats your moms house you ingrate boy she worked hard to make it nice and you burned it to be an edgy boy. haha i’m harsher on men to counteract how extra forgiving everyone else is to them. women get called selfish men get called cool
BUT my POINT is now I’m not disappointed with those story choices any more. Because LOOK at this conversation. okay okay. I gotta Trust Rusty’s Process. Rusty cut things because they had to be cut, because she saw a better story potential. This is a cool moment. As much as I love a murdered Chris and as much as I love the idea of the house being burned, I am thinking this right here is gonna be worth it.
Hoping in the next page Shez says “AND IF HE FINDS US I WILL KILL HIM” HAHAHAHA COME ON SHEZ COME ON SHEZ COME ON SHEZ COME ON SHEZ COME ON-
Anyway I love reading all of this, I love seeing the issue of separatism being brought up, I love seeing a story where no one is like “lol crazy women need to learn that some men are okay”, like it just feels disrespectful to Not All Men a woman who has been through that. I think sometimes trauma doesn’t make people illogical or irrational or mentally ill. Trauma actually sometimes makes people see The Truth. The Actual Real Truth. A lot of the time in society we live disconnected from the reality of things, but when a horrible incident happens to someone it can make you go “oh. shit, that’s something that can really happen. and this is actually very common. This is more common then society wants us to believe” Of course there is damage that comes along with severe trauma that needs to be healed, but I’m sick of trauma victims being taught that the things they learn from their trauma are unrealistic. This story understands Shez, Meriam and Rocky have a deeper understanding of what men are capable of. They are authorities, two of them are respected teachers who women come to learn from. It’s great, very powerful. Rocky isn’t seen as irrational for her avoidance of men, instead we’re going WHAT THE HECK? At Rissa, who is choosing to live in the denial that society sells us about how deadly men can be, despite her beloved family having personal experience.
You tell an important story and share an important perspective. It’s too bad a lot of women will be put off by the trans stuff, and will assume everything you have to say has no value because of the trans stuff. I certainly hope some of the people who engage with your work while being angry about your stance on trans issues can give some thought to some of the other topics you bring up. This kind of survivor-first perspective that treats survivors as the experts on their own experience is very rare in most stories. The Shez story really can stand alone on it’s own and I think it holds a lot of value.
ps love jaden thinking about how male-oriented belief systems is so damaging even without a man being violently abusive. Men ruin families while still being “loving fathers”. Maria sure didnt pop out of her mother’s womb certain that women have no value unless they are housewives and mothers. She didn’t decide to ruin her daughter’s life all on her own. She had to be taught that women have no agency and must be subservient to men.
gosh. truly great work as always
rustyhearts
WELCOME BACK, BELOVED 🥰🥰
I promise your trust will not be wasted 🙏🙏 I love that you felt the same about FMA and the house burning too tho, damn! Felt so disrespectful sheesh!
I love what you said about victims understanding a truth, rather than being made delusional by their trauma – which I think is a common narrative particularly when it comes to women who’ve suffered from male violence. Hell, in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy when treating PTSD, “all men are dangerous/ no man can be trusted” is an example of irrational thinking or a “stuck point” that needs to be “corrected”. Makes me fucken livid.
You’re so on the money about Shez and Meriam being treated as experts due to their experiences too. That’s exactly what I wanted to come across so your analysis is very vindicating ❤️
Thank you so much for another long, thoughtful comment. It’s always a delight when you pop on. I hope I get the pleasure of hearing your thoughts on the last few pages 🥰🥰
Tenbelow
ding-dong edward elric burning his family’s happy little house just to be an edgy boy vs Shez burning down the house that was an ACTUAL PRISON to her WHOLE FAMILY it’s just SUCH A HUGE CONTRAST. Even though it’s already clear to me I’m going to vastly prefer the version of the story you settled as being the best I am ALWAYS going to fondly think of that fire. I’m glad you told a commenter about it. Your creator’s commentary is the best. The alternative version brings me so much joy. Just that image of Shez standing outside a burning house smiling while her little sisters happily roast marshmallows on the flames (i know they wouldn’t actually happily roast marshmallows shh this is my dream)
yyeeeeuuccckk I didn’t know that about CBT 🙁 That’s a real shame that distrust of men just CAN’T be treated like the natural, normal and logical choice that it is. Can’t be having that in a patriarchy, no no no! I mean like we really do have statistics on our side. we all know what the biggest danger to women in human society really is….. What a waste of time it is to try to gaslight a person rather then try to help them solve their real problems. I like to think that no one in this family was subjected to that kind of thing in their healing journey, and if they were, I hope Meriam was like “NOPE, WE’RE GETTING HELP SOMEWHERE ELSE”. though I do think it would make sense if it did happen, and maybe some of the younger sisters agreed that Forgiving Men Is True Healing :/ there isn’t always a lot of options about where to get help, especially when a person is low income with few resources.
I have to admit I am getting lazier about commenting regularly compared to how I used to be. It’s really like cool how much your comment section has grown, I feel like I don’t need to say as much as I used to because there are so many other thoughtful women here, many of them catching things I didn’t even think of. Sometimes I just don’t feel like I have anything to add because other women have already said so much smart stuff already. but you know with comments the more the merrier. Even a simple “ME LIKE COMIC GOOD JOB RUSTY THANK YOU FOR MAKING ARTS STORY GOOD” is better then nothing 🤣 gotta do my part to fight how weirdly low engagement the internet has become for creatives these days (i swear artists used to get more comments back in the Old Days of the Old Internet)
rustyhearts
If anyone ever feels like writing the alternative outcome, I’d be so here for it. Definitely consider Shez burning the house with Chris inside as an AU lmao!
So glad you enjoyed the creator’s commentary though 🥰🥰
And yeah, the CBT stuff is depressing 🙁
I will be touching a little on it in the Epilogue Pages that will directly follow after Chapter 12’s conclusion. There’s 8 parts (some multi-pagers) to look forward to 🥰
Also, please don’t feel bad about not replying as much, I’d hate to make you feel forced to! I appreciate anything and anytimr you have something to say 🥰
I still remember where I was when your first long comment came in, and excitedly reading it to my wife right after I read it. Knowing someone across the globe was so touched by my story really motivated me. I came back and read it SO many times.
And now, yeah! The comment section has grown so much. I love seeing so many regular commenters and getting to know their unique “voices”, and also being pleasantly surprised when newcomers arrive too 🥰
Gush gush, feel good ramble. Thank you for commenting 🥰🥰
Nonnie
I love how Karissa and Christine are just plain straight, even if this comic is about lesbian/bi women. In any other “QT+ comic” they would be straight but with “extra steps” because “being straight in this era is illegal”, according to TRAs, although they would be treated as such by the TIFs clowns, specially Tiff/Kai.
I bet people will complain about Meriam not approving to ‘Rissa’s bf being at her home, but this is not for “heterophobia”, but the fact that she expects that ‘Rissa is not dating another Chris-esque moid. But if he’s a good man, we wouldn’t know because men’s syndrome would make him stay out of the comic to focus only in the women. This is also for Rocky too, but I can see why she’s not interested in dating at all (I’m straight but my ship sailed time ago to seek for a couple, I want to live on my own being happy myself first).
And I have to say I looooooooooooove the coloring in this page. You’re really getting better to pick the right colors about the “vibe”: Happy women in the page? Everything is colorful. Women in distress? 2 colors palette or a dark scene to make sure this is quite serious. It makes me happy how much you’re progressing as an artist and it makes me happy to see it myself.
MinkaWords
Love the pro-separatism here. Can confirm as someone who has never had (and never will have) a boyfriend that it’s one of the best ways to avoid violent situations. I know people will say that’s extreme, but isn’t there a statistic that most women are murdered by a male close to them? Also, I’ve never come across a man that was worth being in a relationship with anyway.
rustyhearts
I know the statistic you’re talking about, men that women are close to are one of the biggest dangers, yeah.
I think there’s an interesting parallell between criticisms of self-defence and separatism, especially when it comes to insinuating that encouraging either is “victim blaming”.
“So the women who don’t participate deserve the harm that comes to them?”.
No, of course not. Men are responsible for the harm they do to women. Though, the part unacknowledged is that they CHOOSE to harm women. They cannot be convinced of women’s humanity. So premeptive/protective measures like self defence or separatism are left in the hands of women.
I thought it made a nice link to tie the two together in Shez’s philosophy for self defence.
Also happy to hear you’re prioritising your safety and happiness ❤️❤️
Nonnie
And now we can confirm it with the men vs bears thing.
rustyhearts
Omg yess, I’ve seen that going around!
MinkaWords
Thank you ♡ I definitely agree with you on taking protective measures. I also think it’s like “prevention over cure” with diseases. Yes, people already sick absolutely deserve a cure, but prevention (such as vaccines) makes it so that you’re far less likely to get sick in the first place.
Also, forgot to say this in my original comment, but I like that Rocky is a GNC, celibate straight woman. They’re few and far between, but still definitely exist. One is a very dear friend to me, so it’s neat seeing someone like her in this comic 🙂
Tenbelow
Proud of you for being able to make this choice. A lot of women talk like being single is terrible and unbearable. Also, there’s a lot of social conditioning encouraging us all to be desperate to have a boyfriend. But you are so right when you say men aren’t worth having relationships with anyway. If they aren’t nice people who will improve our lives, we shouldn’t compromise and date them anyway. Women tend to be way more caring, compassionate and better listeners. Having a good female friend is fulfilling in ways having a callous boyfriend would never be.
Ty
I meant to vote for Risa 😭 but just wanna say I discovered ur comic today because I say a call out vid for you on yt abt ur beliefs but I love ur comic I read it all in one night and i think a lot of our beliefs are the same but difference is ur more brave abt urs than i am abt mine I love the comic tho and hope you make more pages soon I would’ve kept reading even if it was a million pages lol
rustyhearts
Whoops! It looks like she’s gonna be the winner anyway 😅
Thanks for leaving a comment, new pages coming at you every Sunday. Welcome aboard 🥰
Just a rand0
Hey so, I hope that when it’s not from a place of deeply bad faith or malicious intent you’re still ok with comments from someone who, while not exactly in a popular way(?), does fall into a category that essentially is, for all intents and purposes, trans.
I want to say that, while I don’t 100% agree with every last Outside-The-Comic perspective, it is still very liberating to see dynamics and forms of faced misogyny that within the more popular sects of “the community” go completely unaddressed for the sake of what seems to be temporary comfort, or not stirring the pot.
I have, for example, faced actual and blatant misogyny from trans women while being told I’m not allowed to call it such because I’m “aligned” with masculinity and they are not, without any invalidating I would seek comradere from other trans people, and had under a niave good faith assumed trans men, trans women etc if truly wanting to unpack things like misogyny would want to hold people accountable for actively perpetuating it under a different name, and as I suppose you can guess, that was largely and overwhelmingly (online at least) not the case.
I’ve been told I couldn’t talk about a trans woman who tried to coerce PIV, I’ve been told by other trans men that I’m broken if I don’t want PIV, I’ve seen broken and shattered people still bending over backwards to not acknowledge that what we’re taught to think about people in relation to their bodies when we grow up can still impact how we treat people even if (as the terms tend to go) gender identity, presentation etc is changed.
It’s to where, with those few exceptions, I cannot even speak on the misogyny I’ve faced from some cis men without being policed by other trans people, predominantly trans fems who still live their lives as cis men, ans trans men who exclusively live for the validation of anyone with a penis.
So, know that even among “us”, many can see themselves and there struggles here, even when we might not see eye to eye on things like semantics, or the roots of some concepts.
rustyhearts
Hey,
Thanks for leaving your comment. You’re more than welcome here, and also right on the money re: commenting good faith, being the general criteria 👍
While I am completely unsurprised about your experiences, I am sorry that you’ve had them. You’re right to notice something is amiss, and it’s not exclusive to trans communities, nor did it start there. I’ll admit that all day, everyday. No mixed-sex group wants to acknowledge misogyny.
I guarantee that regardless of your gender-identity or lack thereof, misogynists (anyone who doesn’t want to acknowledge it) would find another way, or excuse or rule to silence you. Recognizing patterns of mistreatment and why they happen is the last thing an oppressor wants. It’s much easier to control/exploit/harm those who don’t recognise their oppression, and its certainly better on an oppresso’s own ego/ conscience.
The most powerful thing you can do is continue to speak the truth as you see it. (That’s why I make the art that I do now).
Those who want to stop you from speaking aren’t worth being around- regardless any other identity markers they have.
I’m sorry that you were made to feel broken for not wanting PIV, and shut down when naming predators who use their identities as a shield. I’m sorry our experience with misogyny, and being silenced for trying to talk about it are what make us similar, underneath all our differences in beliefs. I wish the reality of being born female was different.
Thank you again for writing and sharing your experiences. I’m genuinely touched by your comment, as I am by many readers who also see themselves in the perspectives I portray. It reminds me that I’m doing something worthwhile, that the art I’m making now is important – even if not to everyone, and to keep speaking up about misogyny.
I hope you will too.
LesAnon
Not related to the page, but I wanted to let you know that some douchebag made a “takedown” of your webcomic and it got a ton of views.
rustyhearts
I have been made aware 😅
Isn’t the first of its kind, won’t be the last. That’s all part of putting yourself and your work out there. Feel free to investigate/engage for yourselves if you wish, but don’t do so on my behalf – I’m not interested in weighing in on it.
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